Mirror Mirror On the Wall

Mirror Mirror On the Wall

Is my relationship with mySELF, or my FAMILY

as stressful as my relationships with MEN?

Time it takes to read this blog: Just about 15 minutes
Do you constantly seem to attract partners and engage in relationships that do not serve you?
Do you hear yourself saying words like ‘I can’t go through this pain AGAIN!”
Do you find yourself feeling abandoned or rejected ‘too often for comfort’?
Are you stuck in a grieving pattern where you just ‘can’t seem to let go’ of the pain of a lost love?
Are your family relationships troubled, or have unresolved issues…sometimes even after someone is deceased?
Are you frequently at the ‘receiving end’ of bullies, whether it is in the workplace, or your personal life?

You may not be aware of how intertwined your subconscious life’s memories are, with the  way that your romantic relationships play out. It may not have occurred to you just how closely our parents’ relationships with each other (as a couple) so often tend to ‘set the stage’ for how WE engage with OUR partners …and how even as far back as our grandparents histories and relationships with you and each other, influence our views of the world at large.

Health sciences now very clearly show that learned behavioural patterns as far back as even our great grandparents are filtered down, and are implicated not only in the choices we make and stuck patterns that repeat in OUR partners, but also in the way that our physical and emotional bodies express health…from ‘little symptoms’ to very difficult illnesses: e.g. eating disorders, mental health issues such as depression and psychosis, immune system disorders such as cancer, diabetes and arthritis, and weight management difficulties, to name but a few.

Stress – emotional ‘dis-stress’, loneliness, guilt, unabating anger, blame, feelings of abandonment and rejection, etc are all very debilitating emotions that set us up to make choices and behave in ways that constantly cause us pain.

‘Hand me down’ stuck emotional patterns created from our life experiences with our parents, grandparents, siblings and other family members, teachers and bullies in the playground, to name just a few, are also commonly related to not achieving those Life Dreams and Goals that seem to evade us. They are frequently connected to recurring negative patterns of attachment with abusive or destructive relationships, or people that seem to enter our lives (whether romantic, platonic or business)

In order to heal from these stuck patterns, and forge new and healthy romantic and other relationships, we must be brave enough to look at emotional and life patterns that are still recurring, that do not serve us. When we do this internal work on our ‘little inner person’ (our subconscious mind) goals that feel elusive become achievable;  relationships that are dysfunctional or uncomfortable, no longer continue as unresolved; those ‘elusive great relationships’ not only become possible, but probable. It is essential to look at ‘undoing’ the old beliefs created when you were just that ‘little girl”, or ‘little guy’ …when you did not have the life skills to support a more balanced perspective on specific experiences, or other people’s beliefs, behaviours and choices.

We must help your ‘little person’ by ‘giving her or him their voice’ so that you make new decisions and manifest new positive behaviours from a more solid and stable platform.

There are several different excellent Energy Psychology based therapies available to support discovering and addressing these areas,  including EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) – an outstanding Energy Psychology as Practitioner or Self Help techniques.

An outstanding Self Help book is The EFT Manual by Dawson Church.

Another excellent Therapist supported combination of Energy Psychology methods is the unique ‘Emotional Clearing’. It is a combination of several energy psychology modalities, and takes the form of a personalised, flexible yet structured conversation, guided all the time by Academy of Wellness Director and Functional & Integrative Health & Wellness Practitioner Mary-Lou Harris. Together you explore your past, identify the key stuck emotional patterns and the main people (key players) involved in those stuck patterns, and help to resolve them. You then integrate them into your future and discuss practical ’emotional tools’ and strategies to support new ways of dealing with existing situations.

If you are struggling with stress and anxiety, there are a good many foods that can soothe and support your Stress Management (Endocrine) System:

  • Brown rice (as the B vitamins and magnesium in the husks are calming and stress relieving)
  • Buckwheat (which is not wheat but a seed, so a great substitute for wheat foods) is packed with magnesium (known as ‘Nature’s Relaxing Mineral’)
  • Oily fish has been shown to markedly improve anxiety and especially depression.
  • Turkey contains the protein tryptophan and when eaten with foods such as garden peas or lentils (which contain folate) helps the body to convert the tryptophan to serotonin…a ‘happiness inducing’ brain chemical that helps to ease depression symptoms.
  • Pumpkin Seeds are full of magnesium (nature’s relaxing mineral) as are watermelon seeds (so toast, roast or juice them as opposed to throwing them away).
  • Eggs are natural tranquilisers. Recent research is clear that they do not in fact raise cholesterol, as previously touted.
    • Cholesterol rises due to stress, as cortisol is produced on demand when you are stressed, and cortisol is made of cholesterol!  Therefore a good cholesterol stabilizing food programme should also include a stress management lifestyle.
    • An outstanding way to start your day is by eating 1 or 2 organic – but if not, at least free range – eggs per day, as this ACTUALLY LOWERS CHOLESTEROL, which is directly opposed to the old myth of ‘eggs raise cholesterol’.
  • Low GL fruits and non starchy vegetables;
  • Protein combined with carbohydrate to lower the GL of the carbs
  • Cinnamon (which mimics insulin – therefore please do not exceed more than half a teaspoon per day)
    • Cautionary note: do not exceed one teaspoon of cinnamon in your food or drinks PER DAY, as it can have a blood sugar lowering effect that is too dramatic, which will send you straight back into the negative feedback loop where you will crave stimulants or sugary foods/drinks, in order to raise your falling blood sugars again.  If your blood sugar drops too quickly, you can become dizzy, feel faint, and perspire excessively. If this should happen, the best way to support the symptoms are by having a teaspoon of maple syrup in some water, and also a nut butter, or avocado, or small block of goat’s cheese (i.e. fat and protein) to stabilise the blood sugars.
  • Turmeric (which has blood sugar stabilizing and anti inflammatory properties)
    • Always add a pinch of black pepper when you have turmeric, as the active ingredient piperine, improves the assimilation of the turmeric.


Foods that hurt your Endocrine System:

  • Remember The Academy of Wellness Mantra:

W+W+W = WEIGHT (and other ill health symptoms)

    • White + Wheat + Worry are the WWWs:
      • White e.g. refined carbohydrates; cow’s milk and cheese, and sugar
      • Wheat e.g. bread, pasta, flour products like cakes and biscuits, etc) Wheat (including spelt and kamut) is particularly difficult for an overworked pancreas, which is where your insulin is produced, so compromises your body’s blood sugar regulation (and digestive function)
      • Worry (any stressor, be it emotional, or a stimulant like alcohol or caffeine or cigarettes etc)

For additional information and food and lifestyle support, we have decided to try something a little different…and support as many people as possible through a NEVER SEEN BEFORE, ALL TIME LOW PAYMENT PLAN where you can pay just *£1 or £2 PER WEEK for your choice of either or both of our more popular short courses.

We would also love to further support you by giving you three of our many Yummy Therapeutic Recipes that will really support your hormone balance:


For more outstanding information on stressful relationships and forms of support, the The Fix Your Hormones Summit’ is a wonderfully informative collection of knowledgeable speakers, where you can watch for free for a specified time, or purchase the summit at a big discount during the discount period, if you miss your favourite speaker. Click on the link to see the incredible line-up of speakers, and to diarise the day they are airing, so that you do not miss the talks that resonate with you most – get it while it is free 🙂

We wish you “A Happy Heart and Happy Relationships”, and if you ever need ANY further support, please do not hesitate to allow us to help you further, by either booking a FREE 15 minute online support chat  with one of our OHSC Directors, and Attending Integrative Health & Wellness Practitioners or take a look at our Menu of support services and discounts at The Academy of Wellness Online Health Support Clinic.


We have done the research for you, to identify superior quality foods and supplement products. This takes the guesswork out of the purchases for you. Simply click on any of the ingredient links in our recipes and it will take you straight to a brand on either Amazon, or The Natural Dispensary. These are great in terms of quality and value for money.

If you live in the UK or Europe (or any other countries that the Natural Dispensary (ND) post to via courier) we would love to support you with a 10% discount on all your future supplement or food related purchases through the ND:

Simply type ‘Mary-Lou Harris’ as your referring practitioner, and put the discount code ‘MLH010’ in the Promo code box when you check out at the end of placing your order.

We hope this support saves you money, time and frustration when making healthy product choices. ♡



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